Assuming the best
Paige Wesley, IABC’s v.p. of marketing and communications, thinks out loud on marcomm 2010
This morning I watched a man sticking his fingers in the change slots on parking meters (They give you back change? Who knew?). Given that it’s Friday and Friday is my long-standing day to support a random homeless person, I offered the man a few dollars. He started at my presence, his eyes went wide and he said, “Oh no, I don’t need money!” My mistake. My assumption.
So what gives? Whether he just likes to collect coins or has a nervous habit, I’ll never know. The whole 3-second exchange put me in mind of Carol Kinsey Goman’s presentation at the IABC Leadership Institute for chapter leaders earlier this month. Carol talked about the role of non-verbal communications and how often we make assumptions about people’s body language and non-verbal cues. These days I catch myself with my arms crossed over my chest and wonder if my colleagues think I’m physically cold, emotionally cold, defensive – most likely I’m contemplating but they might not even get there. Where do my non-verbal cues lead them – what assumptions do they make about me?
Heavy stuff, and something we don’t necessarily pay enough attention to. Carol’s story about the polished banking executive whose only weakness was foot tapping at an awkward question reminds me that all of us are guilty of being ― um ―human. And we all need to pay attention to our presentation skills – everything from voice and words to hands, gestures and yes, even our feet. If I say I’m a professional communicator, then I better pay attention to the “professional” top to bottom, inside and out.
And then there’s the assumption side of communication. My not-so-homeless coin detective was not what he seemed. When my best friend clears her throat I’m still not sure if it’s her way of creating a pause (a nod to those of you who love your “ums” to create space for thought) or if she’s passing judgment on our conversation. Gee, maybe I should ask. We make assumptions, constantly, throughout the day. And really, we have to. That great big smile on my friend’s face means she’s happy to see me. The guy on the ferry with his head down definitely does not want a seat mate. The warm voice and easy presence of a professional speaker on presentation skills tells me I’m doing just fine. Well, that’s one way to look at it.
These days I could get very caught up in assumptions. Three weeks in to my work at IABC and there’s much to learn. Quick decisions could be made on assumptions. Thankfully, my mother taught me to look before I leap. Ask questions in order to avoid assumptions. So bear with me as I ask lots of questions and look to you for insight. I’m pretty comfortable in my assumption that you’ve got my back. Thanks, I appreciate it. My arms are wide open and I’m smiling at you.
The Real Thing
Posted by Chris Grossgart
Southwest Airlines’ Spirit magazine has a monthly feature “Life Apps” that offers advice for simplifying your life. Think Heloise meets the Dalai Lama. In the October feature, Coca Cola CEO Muhtar Kent shares his secrets to managing his workload. With some 92,400 employees in 200 countries, here’s a guy who can teach a thing or two about time management.
Kent gets everything done by spending an hour a day on these tasks:
5 minutes - Keep a journal
After every meeting, Kent writes down his expectations and next steps. He explains that “the physical act of committing next steps to paper sends a message to my team about who’s accountable and how I want something executed.”
15 minutes - Rehearse communications
Kent says his primary role as CEO is to effectively communicate the company’s vision, so he shuts his door for 15 minutes a day to rehearse his communications with key audiences.
10 minutes - Tap your trusted advisers
At least once a day, Kent asks a colleague for advice because he believes that everyone can improve their listening skills.
20 minutes - Be responsive
He closes each day by taking 20 minutes to respond to those who reached out to him. His rationale is that “if someone took the time to send me a thoughtful message, I owe them the same respect.”
10 minutes - Phone friends and family
Kent keeps himself grounded by connecting with loved ones. With a hectic work schedule, this helps fill a basic human need and reminds him of what’s important.
This CEO stays on top by spending an hour a day on the essentials. What’s that thing you do?
Sunday, February 7th, 2010
You may have caught wind of last week’s Facebook meme, Celebrity Doppelganger Week, when Facebook users switched their profile photo out with their famous look-alike. The trend went viral as users all over the world swapped our their pictures.
Here’s the Facebook status update that showed up in many of my [...]
Saturday, February 6th, 2010
This morning I watched a man sticking his fingers in the change slots on parking meters (They give you back change? Who knew?). Given that it’s Friday and Friday is my long-standing day to support a random homeless person, I offered the man a few dollars. He started at my [...]
Saturday, February 6th, 2010
Friday, February 5th, 2010
Two comments from the recent IABC member survey:
“I hear far too much about social media. It’s not appropriate for all businesses.”
“Provide more information about social and other new communications media.”
As much as I personally grumble about the necessity of learning something new after all these years as a communicator and [...]
Thursday, February 4th, 2010
Sure, the term “political correctness” is rife with negative connotations, but the concept of using words that don’t offend or that reinforce a disadvantageous stereotype is common sense. Thus, my confusion over the report that White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel called a group of liberal activists “f—cking retarded.” [...]
Friday, January 29th, 2010
Nothing says home like the smell of bread baking in the oven, or this week’s gathering of 200 passionate volunteers at IABC’s Leadership Institute. Thrilled to escape the - 9C temperatures in Ketchum, and reconnect with some of my favorite people, I’m in San Diego this week to coach, learn, [...]
Friday, January 29th, 2010
Today is a milestone day for me.
Today, just about 26 years after I first walked in the door of what was called TPF&C, I am retiring from Towers Perrin, which is now known as Towers Watson.
I am a bit overwhelmed at how many years total to 26, how quickly they [...]
Wednesday, January 27th, 2010
The new year brought a fresh start as I moved from the senior vp education role at IABC, to vice president of sponsorship, and from sunny California to a blend of sub-zero and sub-torrid climates. Usually one to dodge change, the job transition was surprisingly effortless, as was letting go [...]
Tuesday, January 26th, 2010
I read an interesting Bloomberg article about using parmesan cheese as collateral to secure loans to buy milk and thereby helping Italian cheese makers get through the recession. Imagine that each little Parmesan wheel holds the equivalent of 550 liters of milk!
The loans are good for up to 24 months [...]
Tuesday, January 26th, 2010
I was gratified to learn that Friday night’s telethon organized by George Clooney raised $58M and still counting. It is not only the money raised that pleased me, but also the idea that celebrities joined together to do good for others, instead of heading for the plastic surgeon’s.
I also read in [...]
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When IABC people gather, the energy is contagious.
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2009-2010 IABC Chair
Oh, Canada.
How fortunate we are – those of us who live next door – to be so close to the Canadian homeland of such bright, articulate communicators. And what great times this week with our chapters in Ottawa and Montreal.
(You know, the best part of being in the [...]
By D. Mark Schumann, ABC
2009-2010 IABC Chair
In every career in our business, there are moments when we step back and assess the lucky breaks that help us along the way.
For me, just about each lucky moment is connected to IABC.
I was lucky when, as someone entering the profession, anxious to get to know other people [...]
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